The Waves of Grief poem

The Waves of Grief

It doesn’t matter how strong

When the waves come they batter

It doesn’t matter how sad

Those waves crash over, no matter

How prepared

#How surrounded by those you love

Nothing can stop the push of water

The pull of the undertow

Trending water

Going under

Come back up

Put on a brave face for shoe

But the pressure of the sorrow

Actual hurts in my chest

The pressure of tomorrow

I feel under duress

To keep going

Despite the siren call to

Stop floating

And just let go

To know

I will not see you again

Is just too real, too surreal

The waves come crashing

Choking

Taking my breath away

And I say

“I miss you Dad”

And I keep swimming

Heavy legs and struggling arms

All twisted and uncoordinated

My world turned upside down

Disjointed, discombobulated

Debris

Life jacket

Comes past out of nowhere

I just grab for whatever

I don’t care

I’ll take a hand, a laugh, a smile

And hold it like I’ve been given gold

A moment of happiness

Or gratitude

Wherever I can find it

Like a pearl in an oyster

Or a piece of driftwood to hold

When dragged under or over by the waves of grief

Battered and broken

Drowning alone

Those precious moments of human empathy

Can remind me of home

I am Dadless, I am sadness

This is who I am now

But there is happiness

And memories to hold on to too

I am sadness, Happiness

Laughter and loss

Darkness and light

Solid and ghost

I am strong

I am weak

I am a human who’s grieving

I am silence

I am song

I am grateful to be breathing

The poem was written by Viv Chamberlin-Kidd 

17 days after her Dad’s death on 25/01/20

Here is a video of my saying the poem on a FB ‘live’ on 10th April 2020 can be viewed here on YouTube https://youtu.be/5tKJC72lOk4